Bald wochende...

Jawohl. Bald wochende.

Bitte.

Es hat eine wirklich wirklich lange Woche gewesen. Ja.

The Zen Way of Dealing with Annoying Old Neighbour Farts?

Hehe, this is taking the art of mooning to a completely new level!

The old dude doesn't look to overly pleased now does he?

Man it grows funnier every second...

Karate-Kolleague

Yup, this is a colleague of mine.

I certainly don't want to publish his name - you can call him "Mike J" - because he don't want to show off his deadly skills on internet.

Anyhow. MJ plays Pung Fu and is really dangerous.
He master The Testicle Tao in five days and have black tie - third dan!

This year he also won fighting contest for Geriatrics. That is so awesome!
[Btw, wtf is geriatrics? He refuses to tell.]

In background you can see project we work on - it is internet programming for secret Cisco IPa-phone software [where IPa = It Phails, always].

IPa. Haha that funny. We sell it to Cisco and do shitload of money in support consulting. You'll see.

Znoop dodgy dogg?

Damn!

There is a lot of really really sick people out there in Belarus...

Why?

Pipi auf Zagorka

Wünsch sie könnte imponiert auf dem sonnen-baden?

Trink Zagorka.
Gibt hochdruckfeuerschlauch!

Jawohl.

Bush. Not holy bush.

I got angry mail from stupid Bush-lover.
Person said I gonne pay for joking about bush.
Waah, I get scared.
Not.
I say bush not holy. Not really.
He's like holy in "holy Moses"-frekkin' mad. But not wholy holy.

I explain:
There is one holy bush in bible. A burning one. Is the one that Moses found when he hearded sheep and God sat in it when tell to Moses he pissed of on middle east dude president (Mr President Pharaoh) for not giving freedom and he spoketh:
"Moses you tell Mr Pharaoh he's stupid and he free people or I turn your staff to snake. And if that don't work I'll kill and rain shit and stuff on people".
And Moses did.

See the similarities to Bush?
No?

Well, Bush in two elections thinks he is hearding sheep (a.k.a american voter) - like Moses.
He have staff of snakes.
He also talk to God (like Moses. Again). But Bush not talking to Boss in burning bush. No, he do his talking to big boss in sleep. Convenient.
Bush was furthermore also pissed of on middle east dude for not giving freedom to people as he say God given him mission to do.
And I'll be damned if he not both were threatening (like Moses...) and in fact did rain shit and bombs and stuff - and kill people he say he give freedom to.

Hence it is once proven beyond Beyonce Bush is in fact holy-Moses-frekkin'-mad.

One could only hope his Staff of snake +4 would backfire and bite back.

If President Bush Jr was from...

If mr W Bush was from...

Czech Republic

"A mulleht? That is a kind of religious arab leader - right?"




US of A






Norway






Monkey World (UK)





Belarus

"Uh? I see nothing"





And last - If Mr Bush was instead a woman, living in a democracy that actually works
(which implies a working legal system and a government that respect and acts within and according to that system)

Zaggo-sune and Kebappen - hier ist!

Yep - Zaggo unt Kabappen r us.
You guess who is where.

We don't know. Nicht remember.

Photo nicht manipulert

Fahrt r us

Prrrrbrrrbrrrtttfffff....

Ouuupss - somebody done a fahrt in sofa!

Haha - really funny!

DJ Larzlan in beer accident

A friend, Larzlan Norgvakovgrev (yes - The famous DJ Larlzan!) who was trying to import exclusive foreign beer - Grisly Grlosch - to his new bar in Plovdiv (lookk hier) had bad accident on road mit Trabi-lorry.

I think kaminitza-kriminal maybe him crash.
Or maybe he drive and drink and forgot take leak and have to leak in bottle...

Haha - stupid drink and leak Larzlan :-)

But I say - don't cry over split beer.

You by Zagorka and all crowd be happy in your new bar.

Was den fcuk?

Was ist los mit Volk?
Manchmal wundere Ich auf den mensch.
Selbstverständlich ist es ein verrückt Österreicher im Greece wo in den foto ist gefahngt.

"Ja, es burnem im alles Greeece. Vielleicht sollte ich meine leopardishe testikelnfodral abnutzung. Unt mein Schtörtenkrüken für safety. Damn - es ist schwer zu gehen im meine rote pumpens."

Bizzarte.
Schwer bizzarte.

Mmkay?
Mmkay.

Dizklaimert: Dieses ist nicht Ich, Zagorka-Sune oder meine freunde Kebap-Pen.

Microsoft make internet in pocket!

Suck on this stupid Apple.

Friend give tips on brand new product from innovative Microsoft!

They put the whole internet on one small little floppy disc!

I explain how smart these are to you: it mean you can have complete internet in pocket and bring with you to friend. If friend do komputer. Works with best mediaplayer Zune as well. Really really best.

Thank you Microsoft!

Updated: Zune vs iPöd vs Arschnos vs Примадонна Mp3

The best portable mediaplayer, Zune, gets more competition.
Oder?
I have done a very good comparazion between the three big brands in the market. Zune, Arschos and Ipöd. Check out before you buy!
Updated: Примадонна included! (see below)


ZUNE

In one corner: sweet, sleek, all-ruling, best unt very social Zune from big reliable company Microsoft. Hier nice picture of best looking colour.

Pros

• Play and stores more than 3000 movies because big HARD-drive. HARD-drive (tm) is Microsoft innovation! Storage is made up by same stuff you got in komputer. But very very small. And it is Hard. That means it is very rezilient against shock, bumps, screwdriver, throwing and running. Hard.
  

• It come in more than 495 colours. And screen do more than thousands of colour at same time!

• It do Radio-Lan (wi-fi) which means you can use it and surf on internet where ever there is radio broadcast - even in Belarus and Kazakhstan it work! Nice Microsoft.

• You can play game (minesweeper is so best). Because it is Microsoft you don't have to worry DRM (digital right management) - it built in!

• It also comes packed with a telephone and GPRS-navigator. GPRS-navigator means you can use it when drive car and it will tell you where to go. "Go home" it say when drink Zagorka and drive. (Joke). The telephone is good when calling home to tell you be home in time because Zune help you get home right way.
  

• You can also store millions of photo of your pet cow. And really really good - you can share photos (no fee!) with other friend who have Zune and you meet in street. Instead of showing picture or photo on your Zune you send to him over radio and he look in own Zune. Good when he wan't look at phot indecent cow alone ja? :-) You can also share all your thousand of movies you downloaded from YouTube or recorded from TV. Yes you can use Zune record movies from television. Without TV! Fantastic! You just send movie over radio to friend and he look. He even can share it with you back if in street! That is why Microsoft use slogan "Be social"

• Battery will last three week when using many hours.
  

• Big 42" screen to watch everything.

• Best sound when playing music. Best.
  

• Play DVD, DAT, Blur-ray, HD-DVD and CD

• Integrate seamless with Microsoft Music Store - www.allofmp3.com and www.bulgariancds.com. From your own komputer home or library or internet café or free air!
  

Cons:
None! No, seriously - Microsoft has done best player that ever will be! It can do everything!


ARSCHOS

In other corner: Hi-tech, nice design cheapo Arschos flag-ship unt latest Gmini XS200 from innovative Arschos.

Pros:

• Comes with ear-plugs.
• Nice green screen
• Good volume
• Built in AM-radio
• Small size
• Really nice design - brusched metal look!
  
• Made of plastics which is smart - low weight.
• Comes packaged with own matching belt for using when running or throwing javelin.
• Good fun game - snake.
  

Cons:

• Not Zune.
• No Phone
• No FM-radio (no wi-fi)
• Low battery from start. You have to charge.
  

Ipöd
In third corner: Fruit company that in later time thought good idea starting selling mediaplayer after not doing well with komputer - Apple and their not-nice iPöd.

Now they bring an all new model - IpödTouch to market to try do better than Zune in market.

They bring a model you touch. No buttons. Not good apple. Really dirty. And they steal idea from Zune. (You can touch Zune any way you like already yes)

Pros:
---
(Maybe Microsoft lower price on best player...)

Cons:

• No movie play. Just one movie with ugly dude in bandana.
• No enough buttons.
• To small, I dont have hands and fingers like girl. Do you?
• No ear-phone - bad sound.
  
• No phone
• No radio
• No hard-disk (prone to break when using)
• Stupid stupid use and interface. You can only use with komputer and really expensive program - iTunes. Not working without komputer = cannot use outdoor.
• No GPRS - you will never find on map.
• No datatransfer over GPS-modem
• Ugly. Really ugly (no brown? - that is sooo no nice.)
• Screen not even nice green as Arschos.
• Small screen - size like no bigger than my thumb. That is dumb.
• No SMS
• No "Be Social"
• No battery you can change with friend.
• No CD, DVD, Blur-ray or other good format. No format at all?
  
• Not Microsoft Music Stores like allofmp3.com or www.bulgariancds.com

Update - just in!
Примадонна~mp3 [медиа-проигрывателей супер mp3]

I got tips from reader to include new mp3 and radioplayer from manufacturer in Belarus.

Is a special model named after the hit song "Примадонна" (Primadonna) by russian superstar Alla Pugatjova (now in Russian TV-show Fame Factory).

It comes packed with sweet functions that make Arschos and Apple drool like retard turky. (Not Microsoft)

How about both AM/FM-radio? Nice many buttons and knobs. Really resilienz, water proof (good use outdoor!). Play morse-code. No battery. Fits well in rack from every maker. Chic retro look. I like.

Many I/O capablities: scart, AMX, spdif, ethernet, scart, watt, xVGA, xVid, div, tuner, ak47A, VHS.

Handles most media format: BetaMix, Blur-ray, Hard-Drive, Floppy, Orb and CV.

It has own special super processor from Motoroila that handles all defragment of sound signal and data output through northbridge. Use back- and forward compatible PCI card slot for expanding memory (more movies and picture)

Special MUX that blend and process song automatic synchronous with video and subtitle.

Automatic update of Codecs needed to boot and reorg through built in musjka-modem.

This can be a killer media-player for all that cannot buy Zune. Really cheap.

Summary
I did extensive research and good objective comparing. As you can se above Zune still best player and best buy. Arschos good buy but not best. Apple try and try and try but they cannot do better player than Microsoft when only stealing ideas. They have to innovate by themselves and they do not have good track-record as Microsoft who innovated Internet and komputers (Windows!) and mouse and HARD-disc and (the list goes on and on yes).
Propably Apple started with music player to later than Microsoft and they cannot catch up when only copying old model yes? Same like komputer where Microsoft innovated and other try follow and Microsoft do 99% of market today because better and more money?

If not many money - we recommend Primadonna~mp3 player. Cheap alternative for poor people.

If I do forecast media player with advance VAR-model (Hogia) in komputer:
I estimate that in two year we see Zune as leading player with 96% market share (up 7 % from today 53%) and Primadonna maybe 8% market share. Rest maybe 4-5% market?

Buy Zune. It best.

Urlaub foto I

Aber nicht!

Zu fahren durch ostlich europa (Belarus) ist nicht für den poor tourist im Rodacar oder alte Trabanten.
Achtung many road-toll-stationen.

Keine euros oder dollar$ ?
Schwer schmerz.

Wir haben euro unt e-pass wenn am urlaub fahren ja.
Unt keine Trabante.

Another stupid toilet sign - Osaka II

Yes. Crazy sign. Everybody [nicht japanese no?] knows not stand when taking leaking already.

Möglich very important when viele zagorka getrunken ja.

Das sign ist nich manipuliert.

Kebappen reports Osaka

Hello! Now 2007 world championships in athletics is zu ende.
They are strange in Nippon. Problem with toilet. No privacy.
I cannot understand why they try naughty looki looki.
Forbidden. But no. No respect. Strange.

The World Championship results Not good for Bulgaria. Not good at all.
We won no one medal! WTF!

Problem is - we no good at medicine any longer.
Big people we are. Good bones. Big muscle. Good at throwing things.
Good jumping. Train hard with military yes. All year.
But no medal.

Look at Greece. Look Turky. Belarus. Russia. Even Kazakhstan!
All medal. All good medicine.

People say - don't do sport-medicine, gives moustache and hairy armpit woman
(and big boobs/small balls on man...)
Well yes. All women from countries above is hairy ugly.
Medicine ja.
But I say - bulgy woman get moustache at twenty and hairy armpit when twelve already.
But no MEDAL!

USA (we need Bob Kersee! He good medicineman) is specially good at medicine.
They get medal but no moustache.
Propably because many black athletes.

Black are good at running. Look Ethiopia. Look Kenya. Uganda
Poor poor countrys mit no food and no kebap. And no Zagorka.
They cannot afford sport medicine. Never.
But they win LOTS of medal.

We could try buy really good running black people move to Bulgaria.
Like Bahrain. Like Jamaica, Bahamas and Great Britain.
Black in Bulgaria? Perhaps not. As the rock band Beatles sing in "Black in the U.S.S.R" - no black in east is like hack in beast.

So - that is leave us with try do better mit sport-medicine.
I say buy or rent Bob K from americans to Olympics next year = Medals!

We Want Medal!
And fcuk moustache!